Hello Sweetee,

Trust is such a funny thing but it is a normal part of human condition. People are always chasing after money, power and respect but forget the important aspect of trust. If you don’t trust someone would you invest your money into them? Would you give them the power and respect to interact with them or bring them within your circle of trust? If you trust someone you want to be able to predict what that person will do and what situations will occur. I know I like to surround myself with people I can trust, and then I can create a safe present and an even better future.

In order to establish and build any healthy relationship (i.e. friends, significant other, business, ect.) one important key element needed is Trust. Trust is built through the principles of integrity and consistency in a relationship.  Emotionally you are unable to trust exposing your vulnerabilities to people without believing they will not try to take advantage of your sincerity. You will over analyze the probabilities of gain and loss, calculating the person predictable behavior.  So, when a person says to me “do you trust me?” I stand there and ask myself…. Have I experienced your trustworthiness and do I trust myself in order to answer this honestly or should I just keep trying to trust in human nature and not behavior. It’s a hard task to do when people claim they going do something and they can’t deliver and make it seem like I’m the bad guy for wanting them to keep to their word!

However, trust is a learned emotional and logically act. When a baby is born it doesn’t know the meaning of trust but it learns by understanding if I cry mommy or daddy will come to the rescue. But if a baby is raised when he/she cries and their needs aren’t met so naturally their ability to trust wasn’t established properly. With time when you are all grown up now being abuse and bruise your trust in the human society become very questionable! Especially if you’re surrounded by people that doesn’t understand their word is their bond to establish a healthy relationship allow you to know they are dependable and reliable.

As I am getting older, I question when someone say they going do something and they fall short of completing the task or don’t keep to their word… Should I accept their excuses or explanations? I had a couple of people this weekend trying to give me their basket of excuses! But one dude stood out from the rest. When I told him I was tired of his excuses he replied “I’m not one to make excuses and I respect you so this is why I am explaining what happen! I’m a grown a** man so there isn’t any need for me to lye or have to explain myself to you but I am. Like I said I respect you and trust and believe me when I tell you that! This is why I am telling you what happen!” At the end of the day to me they all start with “E” and they are all excuses to me so why should I trust what you have to say when your actions said it all!?

I define trust as the expectancy of me relying on your word. I know I shouldn’t have expectations but if you said it, shouldn’t I hold you accountable? Basically, if you say you going do something like the Nike commercial am I not entitled to you “JUST DO IT!!!” I’m about tired of people not keeping to their word and I am mad at myself too because I am guilty of it too because I did say I wasn’t going give him anymore chances. However, I gave him the benefit of the doubt and gave him another chance only for him to give me a bunch of excuses again.. So what do I do with this new revelation that can I trust you if I can’t even trust myself to follow through? I leave you with this poem I wrote…

In God I truly trust
I can pour my heart and tears and without fear I know he hears me without a judging ear
My eyes may be blinded by my here and now confuse by my future plans
Not able to guide me to the unknown of tomorrow without a clue where I am going or how I’m going get there
I can truly trust God will lead my way with his guiding light leaving his footprints for me to follow
I may stray and get lost alone the way in my own darkness paving a wrong path of misguided understandings of who I am and wanting to trust in another man only to fall short of my expectations of him to treat me like he would like to be treated himself
So when you ask me “Do I trust you?” I would love to say yes and I would like to believe I can trust you but 1st shouldn’t I learn to fully trust me?
Instead of lying I will just reply In God I truly trust and he will give me the ability to trust in you!

Sashaying Off,
Precious Pat V

P.S. You know I have to leave a song for food for thought!!

Keyshia Cole – Trust ft. Monica


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